6/28/10 – Oscar the cat recently lost part of his back legs when a combine harvester ran over him while he was sleeping in a field near his home in the U.K.
Although the injuries were serious, they made him an excellent candidate for a new, cutting-edge procedure that would replace his part of his back legs with bionic cat prosthetics. The prosthetics, called ITAPs (intraosseous transcutaneous amputation prosthetics) are drilled directly into Oscar’s leg bones, and will eventually have flexible prosthetic paws affixed on the ends, allowing him to have a more natural stride. Full Story from ABC News
Chairman Meow Says: Oscar iz now a perfect candidate for “Operation Bionic Kitties;” a diabolical plan first drawn up by Chairman Meow to create an army of indestructible, bionic cats to impose Kitty world rule.
cat robot prototype
Although the science of the plan has yet to be finalized, this photo (see right) has been distributed to the press depicting what the bionic cat prototype will look like. The cats will be constructed of space age materials, and equipped with laser beams on their heads.
Devoid of emotion, the cats will methodically take over the human population starting with the Tea Party Movement, which they will install themselves as leaders of, promising low taxes and small government. Fox News will no longer have to pretend to be “Fair and Balanced,” as it will be used to display a continuous loop of kittens playing with yarn in order to further win over the hearts and minds of the masses.
Through effective lobbying of Congress, the robot cats will drastically change the strategy of the war in Afghanistan, using funds from oil and mineral resources to replant the Afghan poppy fields with genetically enhanced catnip… Yes, my children, Oscar is just the beginning…
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