Chairman Meow Encourages Kim Jong Un to Send Flowers

by Chairman Meow on January 20, 2014

in coupons

cat smelling a flower

kim jong un rosesChairman Meow provides Kim Jong Un with 20% off coupon for FTDSigmund Freud Chairman Meow once wisely said that, “Flowers are restful to look at. They have neither emotions nor conflicts.” Maybe that is why Great Teacher Meow is encouraging his students, including former pupil Kim Jong Un to send flowers to a loved one this Valentine’s Day.

He is also providing a coupon code for all of his followers that will give them an exclusive 20% discount at all year long, including for Valentine’s Day.

roses rocketsChairman Meow encourages Kim Jong Un to Send Flowers: Young Kim Jong Un needs some help with his international image, so maybe he should consider sending flowers to select people?

Besides sending some to wife Ri Sol-Ju, he could send a bouquet to (uncle) Jang Song Thaek’s kids with a note saying something like, “sorry that I fed your father to a pack of hungry dogs.” (Although pears are traditionally sent to resolve such a matter.)

Or, he could send roses to Dennis Rodman, thanking him for his latest visit, with a note like, “Thank you for your latest visit, Dennis. My aggressive nature has nothing to do with repressed homosexuality. Please accept these roses.”

Anyway, what Chairman Meow is trying to say is that flowers are a gift that makes humans happy, that can be sent for any occasion. (Maybe Kim will use this exclusive coupon to save an extra 20% store-wide on bouquets and plants for Valentine’s Day?) If they can help young Kim with his image, they can certainly work favorably for you as well.

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cat taxes

Cats still to pay no taxes in 2014: (not to be confused with the corporate “fat cats” who also avoid taxes) Just a friendly reminder from Chairman Meow, that once again this tax season, cats will be exempt from paying taxes of any kind. They will continue to freely walk around naked in public, and will have no trouble sleeping; day or night.

Although Chairman Meow does not pass judgement on humans for their questionable life choices, he agrees with Voltaire, that: “It is difficult to free fools from the chains they revere.”

Oh well. If you are human and required to do your taxes, at least Chairman Meow can save you some money with these new coupons:

*With money saved on tax software, please consider investing in fishy treats for your kitty?


Cat Jumps on Cameraman’s Head – A cat climbed up a cameraman and perched on his head while he was filming a story for a Canadian news channel yesterday. The cat then sat atop the camera for some time, and appeared to push a number of buttons.

Chairman Meow denies that this was one of his feline agents censoring a news story that he did not approve of.

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